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| OBLIGITORY B-DAY POST |  | Category: Philosophy
Thursday, May 15th, 2003 @ 10:22 pm
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When Brenda's birthday came up, I had a post all written down in my head and prepared to commit it to this toilet that is the internet, by way of my spledid website. All that was left to do was a little searching for a picture of someone sitting in a cake. I searched and searched, and the only one I could find was neither sexy, nor was it wittily ironic in any sense -- just plain dumb. It seemed to suck the will to post right out of me.
Now, hot on the heels of hers, my birthday approches with ramming speed, determined to knock another year off my fading virility. After I turned 18, every birthday after that seems to trigger a twinge of pain somewhere in my brain. After 21, that twinge exploded into a full blown 12 gauge shotgun blast through the mouth. You know, the kind that leaves a Rorsarch test of brain matter on the clean white tile of the bathroom wall behind you.
I feel kind of silly getting all philisophical about it though, I mean 27 is no more of a milestone then the past five or so birthdays I've had. I certainly don't feel old, nor do I act anything like my parents did at this age. My own mortality is as far from my mind as it was when I was 9. I smoke and drink and eat like I have a lifetime left to cleanse my body of its youthful decadence.
But guess what? That's how I play this game, and the next old-acting friend I have that says "we're getting old" is getting a fistful intestines yanked out their ass. YOU'RE getting old buddy, don't drag my ass down with your future planning, 4 beer maximum, den remodeling, in by midnight ass. Just because you're feeling the icy cold breath of the reaper breathing down your neck doesn't mean I'm interested in giving your misery any company, pal.
I got my plans, and they don't include what decorations to hang up for the next upcoming holiday.
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