While looking around for a tutorial on how to parse XML with ASP (so I could do the little curiosity experiment described in the last post), I've found eight million tutorials on how to parse it with Perl of PHP, but every tutorial that deals with ASP and XML shows you how to invoke some fucking homoerotic Microsoft Object that automatically parses XML for use in your projects. I fucking swear, is there ANYONE on this planet that can actually CODE in ASP? Now, I know that ASP is limited in certain respects, such as you can't actually read, write, or delete a file without creating a fruity filesystem object and such, but pulling a fucking text file over the web and parsing out certain key words is, asthetically speaking, something that should be done mannually, not with some fucked up system object that obfuscates the process ten fold.
On a darker note, I started trying to figure out how to do this by hand, and just as I dig in, a whole gaggle of roofers show up at my house and begin pounding the holy-motherfucking-hell outta my roof. I'm trying to look on the lighter side, but the only good thing I can glean outta this is the fact that I've learned that balls of wet toilet paper do not make a good earplugs. I want to kill someone now.
