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| TA-TA-TA-TOOBIN! |  | Category: Social
Tuesday, May 27th, 2003 @ 11:30 am
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 Well, gaggle of us toobin' on Memorial Day to celebrate yet another birthday. For the uninitiated, toobing is the art of placing your posterior into an inflated tire innertube, placing an icechest into another one, placing many beers into your digestive tract, and lazily floating down a polluted and treebranch strewn river or creek. Its usually as fun as a bucket of fun things. Usually....
We got there around 1pm, jumped on in, got a few beers up in us and noticed the sky beginning to darken. Thirty minutes later, it was kind of grey and a horribly chilly wind was upon us. Thirty more minutes later, we were pretty much toobing in what seemed to be a non-stop deluge of rain the likes of which I had never seen before.
When the realization hit us that it was not going to let up for a while, we headed for a nearby "shore" (and by "shore" I mean a pile of sand, sharp pebbles and a host of bugs and pointy plants) where we noticed a couple other groups of people running to for some sort of shelter. Of course, there wasn't any, but you take what you can get.
So, there we are, about 20 people, just stading there in a downpour of biblical proportions (you know, that kind of rain that actually hurts when it hits you), freezing our genitals off, miserable as all hell. After about thirty minutes, I noticed a group of people hovering around one of their friends, then they laid this person on an innertoob on the ground, covered them up with as much craps as they could find, and all huddled around them. Shortly after that, a couple guys ran off in what looked liked "going to get help" mode. Apparently something really Not Good happened, and I really Did Not want to be involved in it. So, about another half hour later, we took off the second it let up a bit to try to get it all over with as quickly as possible, and to put as much distance between us and the greek tragedy that was playing itself out on the shore. I say "let up a bit" because for the remainder of the lesuirely stroll down the river it never once actually stopped raining.
When we finally finished this cavalcade of horrors about three hours later, we heard that the person back there on the shore had gotten hypothermia, so I'm guessing they got picked up at some point. Gee, what fun.
It may be a long time before I can drop my ass in a tube again and enjoy it. The scars from this trip run deep and wide, but I'm sure I'll work through it ... one day at a time.
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| READING |  | Category: Personal
Friday, May 23rd, 2003 @ 11:52 am
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 I used to read quite a bit, but it seems that for the past couple of years its sort of tapered off. Funny enough, this coincided perfectly with the timeframe in which I began drinking heavily everyday. I supposed it would be impossible to focus on a book when the entire goddamn room won't sit still for a minute.
I'm trying to get back into it though. I've restarted my routine lately, which pretty much consists of not sitting around eating and drinking for no good goddamned reason on weekdays, and a couple sets of miscellaneous calisthenics (pushups, situps, etc). I've already noticed how much more reading time there is in the day when one isn't searching (and half the time finding) for the answers to life's problems in the bottom of a bottle. But this isn't a post about my love affair with the drink, I have not the time to write, nor you the patience to read all that I would have to say on that subject.
So, currently, I'm slowly getting back into the swing of things with The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (anthology or whatever), a book that I know most of you knocked out of the way when you were about 12, but I never seemed to get around to. I seem to have lost a shitload of quickness when it comes to reading, but hopefully that'll come back too and this is probably a bad book to gauge my speed on, being as bulky as it is.
After this, girlygirl and foo have me all zooted about Choke, so that will probably be my next conquest.
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| OBLIGITORY B-DAY POST |  | Category: Philosophy
Thursday, May 15th, 2003 @ 10:22 pm
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When Brenda's birthday came up, I had a post all written down in my head and prepared to commit it to this toilet that is the internet, by way of my spledid website. All that was left to do was a little searching for a picture of someone sitting in a cake. I searched and searched, and the only one I could find was neither sexy, nor was it wittily ironic in any sense -- just plain dumb. It seemed to suck the will to post right out of me.
Now, hot on the heels of hers, my birthday approches with ramming speed, determined to knock another year off my fading virility. After I turned 18, every birthday after that seems to trigger a twinge of pain somewhere in my brain. After 21, that twinge exploded into a full blown 12 gauge shotgun blast through the mouth. You know, the kind that leaves a Rorsarch test of brain matter on the clean white tile of the bathroom wall behind you.
I feel kind of silly getting all philisophical about it though, I mean 27 is no more of a milestone then the past five or so birthdays I've had. I certainly don't feel old, nor do I act anything like my parents did at this age. My own mortality is as far from my mind as it was when I was 9. I smoke and drink and eat like I have a lifetime left to cleanse my body of its youthful decadence.
But guess what? That's how I play this game, and the next old-acting friend I have that says "we're getting old" is getting a fistful intestines yanked out their ass. YOU'RE getting old buddy, don't drag my ass down with your future planning, 4 beer maximum, den remodeling, in by midnight ass. Just because you're feeling the icy cold breath of the reaper breathing down your neck doesn't mean I'm interested in giving your misery any company, pal.
I got my plans, and they don't include what decorations to hang up for the next upcoming holiday.
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