I must have taken a break at some point because I recall (or don't recall, however you want to see it) spending my 18-21 year-old years in an drug and alcohol induced haze but obviously not enough to have forgotten what I had learned prior to those tender years.

      I entered the whole computer scene around my fifteen to sixteenth year of existance when printshop and GWBasic were king. I wasn't your token geek, but then again, I was no Eminem at age fifteen. I was just a small person with an asperation to be more than just another spoke in the wheel. It all began when my friend Steve introduced me to his brand spanking new Tandy 1000. The world was never the same for me. After that fateful day, all of my time was spent trying to figure out how these people made these amazing in-depth games on a machine that I could only program to make random circles of random sizes appear on. Then I discovered the wonderful world of BBS's.

      To go off on a tanget, I'd have to say one bad thing about the internet: it killed the BBS scene. The people I met and the games I played in those days have yet to be eclipsed by any experience I've had on the internet since. Finding a person that had an underground bbs with warez and porn on it is an unparalleled feeling in today's internet age where anyone can get a page on Geocities, another loser with another site.

      But I digress, I remember trying to figure out how in the hell people made such stimulating porn with ASCII(keep in mind, these were the days before actually having images transmitted over a modem was an efficient way of displaying graphics). But of course, soon after finding the beauty of the BBS, and exploring its file sections, I ran into my all time nemisis: The PC Video Game. This horroble leech has taken more time away from me than sex, drugs, and rock and roll combined. First It was Crystal Caverns, then Commander Keen, then I hit the mother load baby..... Wolfenstein. Jesus, if you wern't there when it hit the scene, you can't possibly understand it. After MONTHS of playing this game, I got an issue of what I recall as being Computer Shopper, but I can't really remember, which had in it a very vague ad for a game by the same company, ID, called DooM. These days are some of the only days I remember from the haze I mentioned before. Nothing seems to compare to dropping acid and playing this game for hours. It is a moment in my life that will never be duplicated.

      But I am getting away from the point. I remember smoking cigarettes behind my friend's garage. I remember sneaking out and getting drunk at the tender age of 13. But not much else. I wonder if life is any better now. I mean, I now know what a cervix looks like, isn't that enough?

      Ok, enough about me, lemme start a'linking.

      I'm basically throwing this one up for John. There's a site, Movie Quote Quiz, that has all these quizes on movie quotes divided into a few catagories: action, comedy, etc.... Well, I know me and John go back and forth on movie quotes all the time, so I thought I'd throw this one up there and see where it falls with you homos.

      Another tasty little morsel that I visit quite often is The God and Devil Show. Its like a Regis and Cathy Lee type talk show format, except with God and The Devil as the hosts and they grill an eclectic melange of celebrities ranging from Ron Jeremy to Martha Stewert to Marylin Manson. Good stuff all around.

      The best thing about this is the use of the term 'She also developed dragging sensation'. Um, no shit, she has a cannon ball hanging from Ms. Muffin.

      Well, this may be old news, or it may be a joke, but according to 'The Script' (in quotes cause like I said, I don't know if its a joke) to the Matrix's sequel on this site, the entire first movie happened inside of the construct to test Neo. How gay.(Update: guess I should have read the thing a little more, scott has informed me that its a joke)

      On the lighter side of things, I stumbled onto Dare for dollars, where 3 chicks try to stay on a mechanical bull the longest wearing whipped cream bikinis. You don't really get any good shot of em naked but it still kinda gives me a b0n3r.       I apologize for not having anything too entertaining this post, so here's a little treat from my personal stash:

      To those of you unfarmiliar with it, you should check out Booty Call. Its this series of hi-larious little flash games where you try to get laid, a good time can be had by all while playing.

      Speaking of flash, you should check out The Tramping Grounds, Kinda faux spooky, but interesting none the less (I'm sure you'll enjoy it Scott).

      Well that's about it from my perspective at the moment, but here some anus problems for a little bonus: [1], [1]. Have fun, and here some more obligitory porn[file deleted from archive].

      I ran across a pretty damned disturbing Jim Bean commercial (actually the section of AdCritic it's in, Speculation Ads, is full of some good shit [try out these to Boylands Beer ads: [1] / [2], and this Levis ad]).

     I stumbled accoss this guy's account/comic of his early 20's life trying to break into the 'sub-culture' of the 'cyber-age'. Its a damned good read (its kinda a graphic novel of sorts) but in the end he called his proffession 'HTML Coder'. For some reason, the phrase "HTML Coder" sits in my belly like a quart of pus tied off in a used condom. I would have more respect for a person who called them self a 'Batch File Coder'. Anyhow, it doesnt spoil the read at all. Oh yeah, I guess I should throw you a link to it.       That's about enough for me for the night. Over and out.

      Now that the trivalities of website progress are out of the way, let me get down to some links. A good time can be had indeed, whilst veiwing this Matrix parody. A few good reasons not to go fishing: [1] / [2]. I think I may turn in early so i dont go run to the store and get more beer and smokes (my hizzo's at work so i may need some company. See you donkey dicks later.