For the uninitiated, Pseudo was touted as the first (and as far as I could see it was) pure streaming media site. Now I don't mean that it had 400 different variations of the waaasssssup! commercial, it actually had shows. Movies, talk shows, sitcoms (sort of), and all kinds of creamy goodness you find on TV.

Now, it was one of those 'dot-com' companies that had foos-ball and pool tables in the breakrooms, half the staff were probably on coke 90% of the time, but hey, thats what happens when you give people in their 20's a billion dollars to play with.

The sad part is everywhere you find it mentioned today, its as if they never actually did anything, another company with no sort of 'business' aspect to them; another throw-back to when the dot-com was king, and day-traders made twenty-five grand a day.

I'd like to come forth and say I used to hit Pseudo all the fucking time. Of course, in its hey-day I was on a measly dial up connection, so it was even more enigmatic to me. Everytime I went to someone's house (or anywhere for that matter) I immediatly went to Pseudo.com to see if there were any new episodes of my favorite show: Shooters.

Shooters was a talk show about nothing but games (and not just first person shooters, don't let the name fool you), and had guests that ran down the rosters of the 'Rock Stars' of the gaming industry: Carmack, 'Lord British' himself, Paul Steed, and others. It was one of those shows that told inside jokes that only gamers understood, the kinda jokes that if you told around your normal friends, they'd just stare at you blankly.

Now I'm not saying that i have some sort of enormous sentimental attachment to Pseudo.com, just that it wasn't the pile of 'dot-com' shit that its been touted as whenever it's mentioned, another casualty of 'serial entreprenuership' in the internet economy.

And there you have it, a semi-serious post by me. Hope you read it and found numorous misspellings cause I'm pretty drunk right now, so pppttbb.

If you go to Pseudo.com all that's left is a page thanking all the viewers. As a sidenote, theres a site, PseusoLives, that gives links to where different people and shows went after the shutdown.

Return of the Vulva Pump!

Ok, so its just a picture and not a full blown movie like the other one, just wanted to let you guys know that it wasn't a one time thing, obviously a fair amount of people practice this regularly.

I don't have much to say here, just wanted to keep the site updated. If you're looking for a little eyecandy, you can check out John's screenshots page to see the wonderment he created with his own two hands!

Well, that's about it i suppose. Oh ya, I promised you some porn in the last post, here ya's go:

The party was supposed to be at my friend Patric's house (a mack ass deal with a bar and a pool), but his granny came over to spend the day, so its been detoured to Pete's place. Still cool, probably to cold to go swimming anyway, so no big whoop.

Not much going on, went on an interview friday, and have another monday morning, so things are looking good in the job department, I may be finacially viable again soon!

On to a rant:

I was parusing around the net and found something about the whole 'USA government apologizing and offering restitution in the form of money to black people because of slavery' thing, and because of my initial knee-jerk reaction to it at the time, I had never given it much though. So, I got to thinking about it, and I came back to one question: Why would the government apologize? If I remember my history correctly, the Union, not the Confederacy, won. And thinking past that, I don't think they ever lost another civil war, so wouldn't they be the 'governing entity' still today?

So, following this train of thought, black people (whom I consider Americans, not African-Americans) are asking for apologies and restitution from the government body that instituted a full scale civil war, thusly tearing the country apart, for their freedom. That's a little harsh for a symbol of gratitude if you ask me.

On a lighter note, I've noticed the front page is almost devoid of porn now, so I'll try to remedy that next post. Also, the forums are in full effect now, so don't be shy, register and start your own offending rant. There's also another box in the side panel linking to the most active topics in the forum.

Now that that's over with, let's move on. Now some of you might be saying, "Hey, weren't you just looking at porn a couple hours ago on your last post? Are you some kind of pervert?" And I would naturally response, "Yes, I am, why are you here if you're not? I obviously induldge the more 'adult' side of online entertainment to get people to read my site, so shut up and get to clickin!" Then, if you were a hot chick, I'd probably buy you a drink and try to get you to come home with me, but that's another story.

Some of you other people, more astute in the art of literary anal retention, might say, "Hey, didn't you spell Sylvia with an 'I' instead of a 'Y' in your last post?" To which I would answer, "Ya, so?" But really, my only source of information about this woman is online, and its spelled different everywhere you go, so I looked it up on a fan site and it said that its spelled different in different movies too, so there. Oh yea, incase you missed this a while ago, I had a post last month with two really choice shots of her.

Ok, how about we really move on now? If any of you people know what band this is, and where and when they play next, be sure and drop me a comment, spilling the 411 in the process. Now I know shock rock chicks are becoming quite cliche, but my god, that's a show I wouldn't want to miss.

To skip subjects here, I'm sure we've all heard about Jesse Jackson by now, and all the hub bub and that beautiful irony, but I just wanted to bask in it for a moment....... Ah, now didn't that feel good? Man, I wouldn't want to be him, he's prolly got so much pressure on him right now, his brain is about to explode. That's good for him, that's what you get when you make a full time career out of flying around the country calling people racists for a living; it was only a matter of time before someone dug up some shit on him.

Well, that's about it, there's another issue of WTFIT? up for your parusal, so kick out the jams, and remember to always keep it real.

To my libido's dissapointment, I ditched the porn and began playing aif's, wav's, mid's, and the all ubiquitous mp3. Still came up with nothing. But did I quit there? No! Finnaly I came upon the fabled m3u file, the winamp playlist (that is mysteriously supported by WMP, or maybe it was always a standard, who knows...), and BAM! Well, semi-bam! The outer most buttons came to life, allowing one to skip from song to song in the playlist, yet the fastforward and rewind buttons still refused to cooperate.

So, this is where my journey has come to a close my friends. It would seem that Microsoft, in a feeble attemp to make their program look more functional, has put 'decoy' media navagation controls on their tool bar. I feel dirty all of a sudden, I think I need to wash this evil off me, so I'm taking a bath. Or maybe I'm just going to hit the showers to finish off the task I was in the middle of when all of this started; not unlike the the legendary question, 'How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop?", the world may never know.

Of course you can always just drag the little play meter around to navagate through the movie, but if I were to bring that up at the beginning of the article, you probably wouldn't have read this far to find out the dramatic conclusion. Tsk, tsk, patience is a virtue grasshopper.