RANDOM QUOTE
I am the best bodyguard, because I'll take a bullet, I'll take a stab wound, I'll take a hit upside the head; I'm like a Kamikaze pilot; the President got shot because his men relaxed.

-Mr. T
Search
Sticky Posts
The Ghettotenna
SVG Icons
KNetworkLED
Brew Your Own Damn Beer
Latest Comments
Objects in the Mirror (4 comments)
Doo Dah Doo Doo Doo Dah Dah Doo... Big News Coming Your Way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (3 comments)
WTFIT Issue #2 (1 comments)
SVG Icons (7 comments)
A Revolution in Taco Consumption (5 comments)
Links & Friends
Reddit
Kotaku
Hardgeus
PVP Online
Boing Boing
The Sneeze
Penny Arcade
Resources
glitch13.com :.::.: ..:.::. :.:::... Home | About | Feedback | Archive | RSS

BUSY GODDAMNED BEES
Category: Misc
Saturday, March 31st, 2001 @ 08:25 pm
hmmm... seems productivity is the order of the day around here. in keeping with my new mantra of "glitch13 doesn't have to be the only one posting around here" and also in tribute to the new installment of WTFIT?, i've decided to analyze a picture i found courtesy of the good folks at brunching shuttlecocks.

simply to confirm suspicions, that is the viking lady known as bjork. loved by some, hated by some others (most especially the dangerous duo we know and love as mister fix and miss a). i, for one, love miss bjork. i think she's nice to look at and i dig her music and think she's an all-around interesting little chica. however, my appreciation of her is not so blind as to prevent me from wondering what the fuck is going on in this picture???

okay, it looks like this could be a little nod to that pic of marilyn monroe standing over that grate. except that instead of a normal dress, bjork has opted to wear what appears to be a swan. i can only guess that swans have some sort of grand insulation qualities that we residents of earth haven't learned about yet, seeing as how i don't think anyone else has ever decided to wear one before.

now that that part of this nonsense is kind of made sense of, we get something even less comprehensible. to *ahem* coin a phrase- WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? is it a rugby ball? is it an egg? where the hell did it come from? did the swan dress make it? did bjork make it? why does nobody else seem the least bit phased by these goings on? i mean, hell. she's the one that (i can only assume) is somehow responsible for it being there, and the look on her face barely seems to register a "whoops". jesus. sometimes i wish i could just go back to those simpler days of childhood, when anything that i didn't see made right in front of me just came from somewhere else and was made by some other people, cause this kind of knowledge about celebrities is just a little bit too much.

oh, in other news, i nabbed the video for "rock me amadeus" off of some newsgroup the other day and only now got around to watching it. i'm not going to push the limits of glitch13's generosity and store it on his server, but if anyone wants to see it, grab me on icq (#20462095) and i'll send it over. if there was ever a set for a video shoot that must have been a pure fun couple of days to be on, this has to be it. i'd throw up some framegrabs, but i think i've offended everyone's eyes enough for today.

5 Comments...

FIRECRACKER BEER!
Category: Misc
Saturday, March 31st, 2001 @ 12:29 pm
Posted By Brent
Little TV sets going off inside my ears. Space men floating by, firecracker beer.
Chase the deamons lightly; news inside your eye. Up and down the sidewalk; take a Doo Doo Pie. I love you...

If you've never seen that episode of SNL, you missed it, man that was some funny shit.

Well, for those of you not in the "know", I trained Xerxes for a few duties on the site other than writing news updates and being my enema boy, and BAM! you have your brand-spankin-new issue of

WTFIT?


I'm thinking of changing all the issues over to the layout this new one has, I just think I looks a little less clusterfucked. That's about all I have for now, have fun kiddies!


3 Comments...

QUICK UPDATE ON SITE STATUS
Category: Misc
Friday, March 30th, 2001 @ 11:55 am
Posted By Brent
Don't know why I'm posting, really have nothing much to say. I'm sick of ranting about my job in the news updates so I was thinking of making another dynamic page on the site called 'Mein Kampf@Work'. Me, and whoever else would like to contribute, would keep a sort of 'I hate my job' journal, and all of you fucko's would love it.

Aside from that, the new issue of WTFIT? is sitting in my inbox waiting for me to publish, I won't be doing it from work though, so don't expect it till tonight. Its also going to be a milestone of sorts, its the first issue not written by me, although I think I may add in some editorial notes and graphical highlights when it goes to the presses.

And that's about all that's going on for now, besides planning on having the cam back up soon and getting all the database connections consolidated; so lemme get back to work you biatches.


6 Comments...

FORGIVE ME FATHER FOR I HAVE SINNED
Category: Misc
Wednesday, March 28th, 2001 @ 10:32 pm
Posted By Brent
Well, so I'm watching TV and seeing this huge uproar about this Martin Luther King commercial, where they have the him making the "I have a dream" speech in Washington, but its all mixed with computer graphics, so it looks like he's the only person there. Sure, he's an icon, sure its pretty cheesy for some telecom company to use this in a commercial, but does it actually affect anyone in an adverse way? Me thinks not. Someone even used the word 'sacrilege'. Oh pish.

Sacrilege is a computer animation of Jesus porking Andy Dick in a $6 a night room on Airline Highway, with dildos and lubes strewn around the room. This is just, well, who gives a fuck. Sure, he was great. Sure, of course what he helped do was extremely important insofar as bringing true freedom to our country, but think of it this way: How many humorous things have you seen about George Washington (keep in mind this commercial was supposed to be inspiring, not funny; so I'm giving you a mile of rope to hang me with if you disagree), and nobody complained. Fuck me, if it wasn't for him, nobody here would be free, we'd prolly still be gettin fucked up the asses with rolls of tax stamps by British fags with powdered wigs and little cute boxes of snuff.

Speaking of minorities, I saw something on the Daily Show that made me think. Why doesn't the media make more fun of the Amish? I mean, there's a lot of material there, and its not like they're going to complain. If they do complain, then they watched TV or saw it on the internet or someshit, which will prove they're not actually truely Amish anyway, and just pulling that P.C. rage that is all the fad these days, getting offended not because you are offended, but you're guessing someone somewhere is, so you might as well as join in on the being offended fun for the hell of it.

Well, enough ranting for one night, see you homos laterz.


2 Comments...

AN AXE THAT IS ON FIRE. MOST DEFINITELY.
Category: Misc
Monday, March 26th, 2001 @ 11:46 pm
...and that's all i have to say about our most recent poll.

but in other news, i'm sure you're all wondering what is so important that i've got to share it with all dozen of you. and that's a fine wonder to wonder, since i'm sure you've all noticed the prevailing trend in my posts to strictly keep it to things of worldly importance. okay, maybe not worldly, but certainly relevant to the interests of people beyond me. so in keeping with that general theme, i'm going to tackle eminem and brandon lee today. and if you manage to snap a pic or two you can sell them to gay porn sites. i'm feeling that generous today.

for starters, here's what got me on this little bit of rage. for those of you who aren't likely to follow the link, basically it's a little blurb about how if another crow movie gets made, eminem is in talks to play the bad guy. and none other than dmx is going to be the crow. and the author goes on about how this is all an insult to the memory of brandon lee. and that brings us up to where i am.

okay, i'm not going to tackle the dmx thing. more like just address it. i saw "romeo must die". the first five minutes were pretty choice. the absolutely for-no-good-reason special effects that showed x-rays of bones being broken while they were being broken were pretty cool. jet li is always cool. even the part where they made a joke about whoever that singer lady was was pretty cool. something in the movie that left me completely unmoved was the "performance" given by dmx. (kinda like tricky's bit in the fifth element. except that that movie ruled and tricky at least has a really cool voice.) it was like since they had a sorta famous r&b singer they need a sorta famous rapper too. he didn't do anything that couldn't have been done at least as well as some unknown who would have cost pennies to the dollars that they paid him to be in the movie for ten minutes. besides, dmx ain't that cool and on to the next thing.

tackling portion #1- eminem is not that fucking cool. now this isn't your usual bit where the white guy says he doesn't like rapper x because he just doesn't get all that business about people talking over a drum machine. i like a fair amount of rap, really. if i'm flipping through channels on tv, i'm more likely to stop for a rap video than any other kind. i just don't see why eminem is suddenly getting attention for rapping about doing bad things. gravediggaz, anyone? is it because he's white? because he's got such cool hair? is it because his voice and style of delivery are laden with such gravity that we are all compelled to sit up and take notice? got me. i guess i just don't get all that business about people talking over a drum machine.

tackling portion #2- now if you'll kindly direct your attention to the comments section, you'll see that glitch13 pretty much summed it up when he saw this in a much shorter form. except the part about brandon lee having looks. i don't even know that he had those. his dad was bruce lee. wow. b-grade action guy dies shooting a goth-flavored action movie. and i know glitch13 can laugh and say i was pretty jazzed about this back when, but he was too. i saw this a year or so ago and couldn't stop wincing. except the part where that one guy calls that bad guy an ass hair. that rules to this very day. other than that, brandon lee wasn't anything special. it's like saying someone or something cheapens the legacy of jean-claude van damme. what legacy? obviously staged fight scenes and the ability to read a script? he should have gotten a posthumous oscar or something i guess. actually, fuck all this. dmx is as fine an actor as brandon lee ever was. and since the bad guys always get killed in action movies, eminem can be in it, too.

i'm feeling that generous today.

7 Comments...

|