| RANDOM QUOTE | What's important is that in one hour, Quimby would be dead and Franklin would be inside another species.
-Robert Hamburger (off Ritalin) | |
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| HE POSED THE QUESTION... |  | Category: Misc
Friday, February 15th, 2002 @ 11:12 pm
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My New Mind Teaser Technique is Unstoppable
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This was snagged off Ernie's House of Whoop Ass, where it was posted under the belief that Albert Einstein came up with it. There's some dissent around here whether or not he came up with it, but everywhere I seen it around the net, its attributed to the man himself...
There are 5 houses in five different colors. In each house lives a person with a different nationality. These five owners drink a certain drink, smoke a certain brand of cigar, and keep a certain pet. Yet no owners have the same pet, smoke the same brand of cigar, or drink the same drink.
Now, given the following information...
- the Brit lives in the red house
- the Swede keeps dogs as pets
- the Dane drinks tea
- the green house is on the left of the white house
- the green house owner drinks coffee
- the person who smokes Pall Mall rears birds
- the owner of the yellow house smokes Dunhill
- the man living in the house right in the center drinks milk
- the Norwegian lives in the first house
- the man who smokes blends lives next to the one who keeps cats
- the man who keeps horses lives next to the one who smokes Dunhill
- the owner who smokes Bluemaster drinks beer
- the German smokes prince
- the Norwegian lives next to the blue house
- the man who smokes blend has a neighbor who drinks water
My question is --- who owns the fish?
Einstein wrote this quiz last century. He said that 98% of the world could not figure it out.
Now, don't go peeking at it just yet...try to figure it out first.
The answer is here, so don't go posting your answer in the comments and ruin the fun for everyone else. But let me know if you got it.
It took me about half an hour to figure it out.
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| TITLE GOES HERE | | Category: Misc
Thursday, January 10th, 2002 @ 08:54 pm
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| What the fuck do you want from me?
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Well, it looks like its time to clear out the ole writer accounts. Mr.Fix: MIA. Ian: Hasn't posted in two(2) months. Miss.A: Has never posted. Girlygirl: Posted about three(3) times, and in this last one my update to it was bulkier than her post. Hardgeus Said he was going to post, but never did. Of course he has his own website and stuff, but I was thinking that he would have something to contribute that doesn't belong on his site.
You may be saying, "Gee, what are your plans then?" Well, I don't know. If this post doesn't even get a "shame blurb" out of any of these people then I truly have no friends. To tell the truth, this struggle is beginning to tire me. I never pictured this site as being a nucleus of pop culture wonderment, or even being popular in the least, but its fallen quite short of anything I've ever hoped for. On top of that I'm paying for it. In real money.
When I added the commenting system I figured it would add a sort of communal feeling to the site and maybe attract more people than my Real Life(tm) friends. Instead it just brought them out en masse to post comments, not on the pertaining update, but to pontificate about the latest retardation in our small universe -- or throw up a link to the latest Budwieser "What's Up?" parody.
Well, I don't know what else to say but: Do Something. Writers, POST. Visitors COMMENT. Remember there's a search over there to the left in which you can search the past wackyness that has been posted on the site (including pr0n). I also added a email updating system to which you can subscribe to there on the left.
Ok, here's some butts:
   
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| YEU LIKE DAT YEU IDIOTE. | | Category: Misc
Tuesday, November 6th, 2001 @ 09:20 am
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Just a post to show off that I can and because I'm tired of seeing that code red stuff when I make one of my ten billion daily visits. It is most certainly time to type up that resume and get a job.
But in other news...
It seems that leisuretown is being updated again. And anyone who felt overwhelmed at the epic length of some of Mr. Farnon's previous work should be pleased to know that the longest story up now is like seven pages. So get over there and laugh. Plus there's an interview with the guy so you can all get to know about the boy genius who coined the term "one man fag parade".
Ooh, and check this shit out. I was looking for a site that was hosting Heavy Metal Parking Lot last night and when I went to the place where I first saw it it wasn't there. But if you'll kindly scroll all the way down to the bottom you should see the word "porno" and those are the links you want. "Self portrait: porno" basically is these artsy fucks standing around and watching people do it in an art museum and you get to hear their lofty opinions about the whole affair. "I think they should have all been using condoms." Fags.
But really, check out that whole site (supersphere, I mean) cause there's plenty of cool shit. And pretty much anything that isn't cool in its own right is worth it because you get to laugh at art-tards.
over and out.
p.s. whoever gave me this headcold and sore throat disaster sucks.
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| FUCKING SHIT FUCK | | Category: Misc
Monday, October 29th, 2001 @ 08:02 pm
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 This may be a half-assed post seeming as I just posted it and the fucking site lost it. Fuck all. It was actually my fault, I left out the post title, and left out code protecting me from such retardness in the back end of the site.
Friday the plumber working on my house blew a fuse and played switcheroo on all the fusing in the goddamned fuse box and when all was said and done, I turned on my computer and it looked like someone had shit on the electron gun in the monitor. So a day and a couple hundred dollars later, I hook up my new 17 incher and, of course, same problem. Must be my video card (or mobo, who knows).
Work is becoming more and more of a cluster fuck as the days go by. When I first started in the business, I spent six months as a scrubby psuedo apprentice. Then six months as half of the development team. Now, at my new company, after an additional six months, I am now 'the go to man.' Yup, the man with the plan, the last line of defense when the contract is in danger. I can't tell if its because of my amazing smarts, the nature of the software business, or my devilishly good looks. Maybe a mixture of all of 'em with an extra dash of the last one. At least my cubicle comes with perks.
Vulva Pump! The thinking man's fetish!
While searching around for cool asian ass porn, I ran into what I can only describe as a Japanese Wolverine fetish. Then again, what do you expect out of a bunch of people who can buy used women's underwear from vending machines? What a bunch of freakaziods.
Well, that's about all she wrote for this (re)post, and this shit ass blur on my screen is giving me a headache. Have some ass.
  
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| FUCKING COCK AISE | | Category: Misc
Saturday, October 27th, 2001 @ 10:04 pm
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 Well, not much happening. I think I'm going out tonight seeming as I have a cluster-fuck of hell waiting for me on November 1st at work so I probably won't be going out on Halloween night, much to my chagrin.
I don't really know what's up with Fix, I'd think he would have posted by now, but nope, he's being a fucking butt pope. Ian on the other hand has been trying to get the ole I-net access at his new pad for a while now but running into nothing but renter's red tape. Fucking schmoes at Cox are probably just dragging thier feet because of all of the @Home bankruptcy chit. But that's just speculation.
Well, I'm going to get my drink on, let Marty Feldman keep you company on this blustery October night. Boo!
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